Not sure how many "followers" this poor abandoned blog still has... but this entry will be dedicated to the last year of my life. Last night during a Skype session with my mother, she asked me- Would you choose to do it again if you could go back?
It is surely a loaded question.
Over the past year, Michael and I have been through a lot. More than most newlyweds probably choose to submit themselves to... BUT... I would have to say yes and here is why:
Is it because the adults at this program have finally accepted us into the little family that is OHB? No. In fact, to this very day, we are still struggling with the relationships on campus with other adults (even though they consist of about 1 hour of interaction every 9 days, or less). We have been wrongly accused many times. We have been lied about behind our backs. We have had to endure the most immature game of tattling I've ever experienced. This place has nothing on 3rd grade.
Is it because God has sent the right people into our lives at the right time? Yes. While we have certainly had our fair share of issues with adults, God has sent us a wonderful couple- the Keils- to help us here. They have been a light in the darkness to us. They have been our spiritual warriors, side-by-side with us during all the attacks. He has also sent us gifted pastors to minister to us and speak to our situation and encourage us. He also provided the right people in the office that believe in us.
Is it because we have gotten what we wanted here at OHB? No. We are still waiting to hear about this ever elusive cottage. We interviewed about 2 weeks ago now and only by chance did I talk to someone who said they have to fill the 7 empty beds on campus before considering opening the new cottage. No one bothered to explain that as the reason we haven't heard anything from anyone and was waiting on pins and needles to find out our fate. On a different note, we worked in a great cottage and a miserable one. About 5 months ago, we were told we would be switching cottages. Was it finally that we were leaving the miserable one? Of course not. God's got a good sense of humor like that.
Is it because we have gotten what we needed here at OHB? Yes. I think Michael and I could be given a child tomorrow and be awesome parents. We have learned so much about boundaries, expectations, consequences, praising, teaching, correcting, scheduling and what the lack of any of those can do. We have had to lean on Jesus, in a way that my life just hasn't required me to before. I've been taught that God is faithful, trustworthy, working all things out for my good and His glory, refining me, and gives us everything we NEED. I'm always reminded of the song by Rolling Stones- "You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you just might find, you get what you need". :-) Life has slowly taught me the difference. God knew Michael and I needed to live half the country away from everyone we know and love to learn these precious lessons.
Man, all I can do is sing of God's awesomeness! He has surely revealed this to us over the past year.
"We Won't Be Shaken"
by Building 429
This world has nothing for me
This life is not my own
I know You go before me and I am not alone
This mountain rises higher
The way seems so unclear
But I know that You go with me so I will never fear
I will trust in You
Whatever will come our way
Through fire or pouring rain
We won't be shaken
No we won't be shaken
Whatever tomorrow brings
Together we'll rise and sing
That we won't be shaken
No we won't be shaken
You know my every longing
You've heard my every prayer
You've held me in my weakness
Cause You are always there
So I'll stand in full surrender
It's Your way and not my own
My mind is set on nothing less
Than You and You alone
I will not be moved oh
Whatever will come our way
Through fire or pouring rain
We won't be shaken
No we won't be shaken
Whatever tomorrow brings
Together we'll rise and sing
That we won't be shaken
No we won't be shaken
We will trust in You
We will not be moved
We will trust in You
And we won't be shaken
No we won't be shaken
This life is not my own
I know You go before me and I am not alone
This mountain rises higher
The way seems so unclear
But I know that You go with me so I will never fear
I will trust in You
Whatever will come our way
Through fire or pouring rain
We won't be shaken
No we won't be shaken
Whatever tomorrow brings
Together we'll rise and sing
That we won't be shaken
No we won't be shaken
You know my every longing
You've heard my every prayer
You've held me in my weakness
Cause You are always there
So I'll stand in full surrender
It's Your way and not my own
My mind is set on nothing less
Than You and You alone
I will not be moved oh
Whatever will come our way
Through fire or pouring rain
We won't be shaken
No we won't be shaken
Whatever tomorrow brings
Together we'll rise and sing
That we won't be shaken
No we won't be shaken
We will trust in You
We will not be moved
We will trust in You
And we won't be shaken
No we won't be shaken
